Another week, another question. This one, however, caused quite a few debates at DateSpaces HQ. Christina from Forest Hills wrote, “I just got home from yet another date from hell…I was out with this guy and I knew about 20 minutes in that he wasn’t right for me at all! I didn’t want to hurt his feelings, but I definitely wanted the date to end. Is there a way to do this without being obvious?”

Ah, yes. The Date from Hell. Not a place you want to be, especially when searching for romance in New York City. We agree there’s no sense in wasting your time if you know immediately that this date won’t lead to even a second meeting. But it’s officially time to retire getting a faux call got a call from a friend with an “emergency.”

Our strategy is simple: it’s called the “time constraint.” Have something planned after your date. Or, if you’re a good actor/actress, pretend you have a party to go to. If your date is a dud, stick around until you’re done with your activity or meal or drink. Check your watch and mention you have to get going but thanks. Remember to be polite, by the way, just so you don’t look like you’re giving the quick brush-off. Let’s say your date wants to come along, tell him/her that it’s a friend’s small, somewhat private birthday. Isn’t that much easier than arranging for a friend to call in the middle of your date to ask if you need an emergency to abort your get-together? We thought so.

What’s that you ask in response, DateSpacers? Oh, yes. If you’re having a good time and still have those plans (real or otherwise) afterwards, you can always use the excuse that you can show up late or can cancel altogether. That shows your date a lot of interest that you’re willing to break off a party you were planning to go to.

We’d love to know some of your best “Date From Hell” stories. Send them to charles@datespaces.com with the subject line “Hell Date” and we’ll post them (anonymously, of course!).