A friend of ours over the weekend told us she was taking a vacation with a guy she had just started dating recently. While were excited for her, we just want to make things clear about what it can mean.

A romantic weekend can be a great way to move a relationship to the next level: it gives you and your mate the opportunity to spend several uninterrupted days together, which our normal work-weeks, friends, errands, and pesky phone calls from mother never seem to allow. When you go away together you get to push everything else aside for a few days, and focus exclusively on one another. A getaway is an excellent opportunity not only to have fun with your partner, but an excellent opportunity to learn more about the person you’re dating. Traveling together allows you to see your mate in a different environment than NYC, and an intense few days together can give you a much better idea whether this is a person you want to continue dating, or whether it’s time to move on.

That being said, we think you have a right to be wary of a premature romantic vacation. As we have suggested before, allowing several months of dating before you make any large financial investments or kick things into romantic high-gear is more sustainable, and won’t leave you with lots of regrets or potentially uncomfortable situations. Our mantra at DS is consistently: take things slow; let things grow. If you’ve been dating for several months and things are going well, then a trip can be a great way to springboard into a deeper relationship.

If you’ve been dating for just a couple weeks, you might have a fun weekend, but will you have muddied the waters upon your return? Allowing some time for organic relationship growth will make the trip, when you’re eventually ready for it, more meaningful and productive. An additional thing to consider is who is paying for the trip. If your flight and lodging is being paid for, are you setting a precedent? What is expected in return? If you’ll be paying your own way, are you actually ready to spend a large chunk of change on this relationship? If things don’t go well, will the money have been worth it? It might be better to take a day trip closer to home and test the waters before you whisk off to a foreign land.

This article agrees with our sentiments, while this one has some fascinating data to back it up.